The Comeback of a Certain Alchemist
by sentimental-obsessed
Summary: In Alphonse Elric's attempt to bring Edward Elric back from the other side of the gate, the Gate and Equivalent Exchange twist everything around and give Ed back his leg but turn her into a girl! Edward and Alphonse now face new challenges. Female Ed x Roy (Rated M to be safe)
1. Chapter 1

This is my first time writing a fanfic, so please excuse my inexperience.  
>Warning:Fem ed x roy, a little bit of winry x al, sex scenes in later chapters Disclaimer:I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist<p>

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><p>Alphonse stared in shock at the unconscious girl in strange tight fitting clothes he had never seen the like of before. Did he make a mistake? This was not his brother. This was just a girl with golden hair who coincidentally had no right arm. But she had her leg. And he wasn't even sure if she had golden eyes. But the bangs, even that strand of hair that stuck straight up were the same.<p>

The girl's eyes flitted open. Alphonse gasped, his eyes widening. Her eyes were gold. As gold as the setting sun. But his heart sank when she spoke in a language he did not recognize.

"_Sind Sie das? Aber du bist tot. Bin ich tot? Warten, sie nicht Alfons! Wer ... Alphonse_?" The girl's eyes widened in surprise as she stared at the young man who looked so much like Al when he was younger. She made an effort to speak their language. "Alphonse? Al? Is that you? But aren't you in Amestris...?" She glanced aroung the room and took note of the transmutation circle, the window...

She stared out the window at the familiar horizon of Resembool.

"Al?"

The single name pierced the silence. The blonde frowned as there was no response.

"Al?"

"Brother?"

"Oh Al!" She tackled her brother but stopped short as she realized that she had both her legs but not her arm and that there was something soft on her chest. She looked down at her body.

"What the fuck! What the hell is this? Don't tell me...!" Edward looked at Alphonse. "What the hell happened, Al? Why the fuck am I suddenly a girl?" Edward saw the look on his face and paled. She looked back down at the transmutation circle. It was so familiar, yet completely alien...

Then suddenly the truth hit her. "Al? It was human transmutation, wasn't it?"

Alphonse nodded.

Suddenly her eyes blazed. "And it was that fucking stupid Equivalent exchange, right?"

"I-I guess" Alphonse finally managed.

"Dammit! I am so gonna-" Edward suddenly slipped into German, ranting and pacing the room.

"Um, Brother?"

"What?"

"Do you, um, want to at least go to Winry's house?"

"Fine."


	2. Chapter 2

Winry tried to keep in her excitement. She knew that Al would be arriving soon, and she could barely wait. She figeted as she waited in line at the smal convenience store that the citizens of Resembool had manged to raise. She just could'nt wai to get back home...

She let herself in her house and heard Al talking to Granny. Her heart sped up and she set the things she bought at a table. But she stopped short as she surveyed the room. Al was next to, as in right next to a girl... a girl.

No, she thought.

This can't be happening.

I thought that Al, Al and I... especially after what happened to Ed...

Tears brimmed in her eyes.

Al finally noticed her. "Winry!" Then he noticed the tears. "Winry? What's wrong?"

"N-nothing!" She ran back outside.

"Wow, Al, it seems Winry really has a thing for you." Ed chuckled as she saw the blush spread over his cheeks. "So?"

"What?"

"Go after her, idiot! She's sick with jealousy, so sick that she didn't bother to recognize me or the fact that I don't have my arm! Go!" She almost pushed Al out the door.

The weeks passed by quickly. Winry and Granny fitted Ed with a new automail arm and dozens of other things happened. Like Edward discovering periods. And Winry trying to fit her with such feminine clothes.

Then came the day when Ed and Al left for Central.

"Are you sure you want to take the Exam again?"

"Definitely"

"Can't you just, like, reclaim your title?"

"No. Besides, I missed the past four Exams, so I guess it's quite a bit unfair if I just waltz in and become a State Alchemist again."

"But what if you don't pass?"

"Dammit Winry! Can't you stp asking so many questions?" Ed eploded.

Al sighed. "Don't mind Brother, Winry. Besides, I'm confident that Brother will pass with no problem"

"Gah. Thank you, Al. It seems you were finally able to shut up that annoying woman"

"What did you say?" Winry hit Ed's head with her trusty wrench.

"What the hell was that for?"

Al intervened. "Come on guys, you're making a scene. Besides, the train's here."

"Hmpf. I'm still getting back at you for that, Winry"

"How? You know very well that if you try to break my precious automail, I'll be the one earning the money and you'll still be getting your face bashed in."

"Bye Winry!"

Bye, Winry

Sorry about the shortness and lack of detail, I'll try to make up for it next time. 


	3. Chapter 3

So right now, Ed and Al are on their way to Central. Yay. This romance will be unfolding soon. Or not. :P :D

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><p>"Ah," Edward sighed, settling more comfortably into the seat. "This brings back so many memories, doesn't it, Al?" She saw the look on his face and immediately regretted saying anything. She had forgotten that Al had lost his memory when he tried to bring him back as flesh and soul. But the Gate demanded the four years of memories. "Sorry, Al, I didn't mean to."<p>

"No, it's okay. Really." Al promised, although he knew he didn't sound that convincing. Then to lighten the mood, he added, "Sister."

Ed met her younger brother's in a fury. "Alphonse Elric," she managed to get out, gritting her teeth, wanting so bad to fly at her brother but definitely not wanting to make a scene. "Alphonse Elric, I am so going to kill you once Winry lets us spar."

Ed fumed even more when her little brother doubled over in laughter. "Al! We've had this conversation before. No matter what the hell I look like on the outside, I am still your brother in the inside!" Ed practically shouted at him, but then realized just in time that they were trying not to draw attention to themselves. Well, at least Ed was.

After an akward moment of silence, Al figeted in his seat for the billionth time in a row. Not being able to get some shut eye, Ed teased him.

"Not used to trains anymore, Al? I thought you went all over the country and even to Xing on trains."

"That's not-"

"Then what is?" Ed interrupted, casting a suspicious look at her brother.

"I'm just anxious-"

Ed cut him off again. "Or is it because you're already lovesick for Winry? Hmm, Al? She looked pretty heartbroken when we left." Ed smiled mischievously.

"Brother!"

"On second thought, Al, maybe you should really call me 'Sister'."

"Huh? Why? I thought you didn't like it?"

Edward sighed. "Well we don't want any misunderstandings. We might even attract attention and we'd have to go back-," Ed paused for effect. "To Winry."

Edward grinned at the blush forming on the blond's cheeks. "Aha! Knew it! You're-"

"Sister!"

Edward scowled. "It's tough getting used to, though."

Al shrugged. "You don't say."

"Hey Al, what exactly are you so worried about?"

Al twiddled his thumbs. "Well," He finally said "I'm resigning, right?"

"Yeah?"

"And I need to show the documents to Brigadier Mustang-"

"Wait, he's there? In Cental?" Edward groaned audibly causing quite a few of their seatmates to give them odd looks. "So I have to face that stupid damned bastard again? I just bet he's gonna smirk at me and..." Edward got lost in her rant and occasionaly slipped into German. Al caught a few words that seemed more stressed than others, words that sounded like_ shize, ficken, arslow_ and a couple others he guessed were not complimentary to a certain officer.

After a while, the Elric siblings fell asleep, lulled by the familiar rush of the train.

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><p>"<em>Central City! You are now at Central City<em>!"

Ed stretched and yawned, causing her brother to yawn too.

"Cut that out, um, Sister!"

Ed flashed him a look that said 'If it weren't for the sake of not confusing the crowd, I'd totally kill you right now'. He countered with "Well, I wouldn't be yawning so much if you weren't!"

"If you had just slept right away I wouldn't have had to be sleepless by your endless ranting!"

"Just shut up. We're making a scene." Ed stareted walking out the station.

"Wait up, Sister!"

"Wow, this place really has changed after all ths time. Central Headquarters is still in the same... It's there!"

Al just sighed as he followed his brother...sister._ 'This_ sister_ thing will take quite some time getting used to.'_


	4. Chapter 4

"Wow, it really is different." Edward couldn't help saying.

"Stop saying that, Bro-, I mean Sister." Al quickly corrected himself before looking around to see if anyone had overheard. Luckily, no one had. He turned his attention back to his brother.

"Well it really is!"

Ed was gawking around, muttering stuff like 'that looks so much like the something in...', or he'd start doubling over in laughter for no reason, earning a few strange looks.

They finally reached Central Military Headquarters. Al was instantly recognized, being a State Alchemist and having the rank of a major, but Edward was a complete stranger to the sergeant working behind the desk.

"Major Elric!" The sergeant saluted the major. Then she warily eyed the blonde next to him. The blond was wearing a black tank top, a black leather jacket with silver lining, black leather pants and platform boots with the finishing touch of a white coat. She took note that she was also wearing gloves, odd thing at this time of the year, and that her hair was pulled back in a thick braid. The soilder decided that there was something very familiar about her, almost like she'd seen her before, but she quickly dismissed that thought. The girl did look quite a bit like Major ELric, she decided, but with a richer shade of hair and color of eyes. "Major Elric, visitors are not allowed in the Military Headquarters!"

Al waved away the prompt (with Edward nodding in approval of Al's breaking of rules) and continued to walk in the direction of the Garden. He wanted to show Ed something he knew she would love to crticize.

"Major Elric!"

Al sighed. He turned to the Sergeant. "Sergeant, she is more than allowed to enter the Military. If you have any complaints, you can always give them to my commanding officer, Brigadier-General Mustang."

"Sir!"

But they were already gone.

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><p>Brigadier General Roy Mustang hated every single second of it. He would've actually rathered to actually do his paper work in his inner sanctum instead of being forced by Captain Hawkeye to go 'outing' with them to the park. <em>'Seriously, that's their idea of fun<em>?', he thought. But at least they were back now. He and his men marched inside the Central Military Headquarters.

"Brigadier General Mustang, Sir!" The Sergeant behind the desk saluted him.

"Yes, Sergeant?" Mustang saluted back.

"Major Elric has arrived but has brought a civillian, a blonde female into the premises."

Mustang almost smiled. He had been expecting Al to come back soon and he wasn't surprised that Winry might have wanted to tag along too.

"Sir?" The soilder asked hesitantly. The Brigadier General seemed to be in a bad mood, and he and his subordinates were terrible when they got into bad moods. The Major Elric was bad enough when he got mad (which rarely ever happened), and Captain Hawkeye a whole lot worse (what with all her shooting skills, and of course the fact that she always had her sidearm with her) but whenever the Brigadier General got mad, you might as well be dead. That single eye would just stare at you with so much loathing it was Hell. That's how bad it was.

"It's okay, Sergeant. Where did they go?"

The Sergeant blinked. A few seconds ago he looked ready to explode, but now she was fairly sure that he was about to break into a smile. "Um, to the Garden, Sir."

When he turned on his heels and started walking, his loyal subordinates could read him so well they didn't have to ask where he was heading.

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><p>Edward and Alphonse Elric were staring at a statue. Of <em>him<em>.

_'The Fullmetal Alchemist, Edward Elric, specially promoted to Lieutenant Colonel, The People's Alchemist, declared dead Nov. 7, 1914'_

Edward examined the statue from all angles, but her eyes always turned back to the inscription, where they seemed to linger the longest. "Declared dead? November 7? It took them 4 months to realize that I'm dead?" She looked back at the inscription." The People's Alchemist. Huh. I remember all those times in Youswell. And Xenotime. And Liore."

"They saw you as a hero. As someone who helped them."

Edward scoffed. "Except for those times I wrecked their cities."She scowled up at the statue. "That doesn't even look like me. Why didn't they put you?"

"I didn't die. At least, not that they know of." Al added quickly recalling that his brother had told him that he _had_ died. "What do you mean, 'it doesn't look like you'?

"My hair was longer, about halfway down my back. And my, um, antenna is shorter." She pointed to the single strand of hair sticking straight up.

"But Master said that you did that so that it would make you seem ta-"

"Just shut up, Al."

"I have grown taller."

"I know, Bro-, I mean Sister."

"That was close, Al."

He just shrugged in reply.

"Do they have any other statues like this?"

"Yeah. I think they're in all Headquarters. There's one by the mess hall."

"Who made these statues? They're _horrible_!"

"Some guy who claimed that he was good at sculpting."

"Good? He's terrible!"

"Sister!"

"Well it's true! I mean, it looks like shit! Literally!" She pointed to the countless scraps of bird fecees adorning several places on the statue. "You would've thought that someone so well respected after death would be respected as a statue."

"People do still respect him, young lady." A familiar voice made Edward spin around.

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><p>As Mustang approached Al, someone he could distinguish so well, he knew what the back of his head looked like. Then he frowned in the direction of his companion. Winry never dressed like that. Nor did she ever have her hair in a thick braid. And the color was a lot richer than the Rockbell's pale locks. Mustang didn't think that Winry would dye her hair. He picked up the pace and his men almost had to run to keep up. Except for Hawkeye, of course.<p>

He could hear the blonde unshamedly telling Al that the person who was the model of a statue people only pretended to respect must not be so great if they didn't even bother to clean the statue. His mind reeled. Of course people respected Fullmetal. Did this girl not know who she was talking about? As soon as he was sure he could be heard, he curtly said, "People do still respect him young lady."

She whirled around. His eye widened in shock as he met the blonde's eyes. They were as gold as her hair. They were as gold as Edward Elric's eyes.

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><p>Sorry! A bit of a cliffhanger. I appreciate reviews. I'd like to know what people think of my work.<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks so much to everyone who has followed and marked this as a favorite, I really appreciate the fact that someone is reading my work. But I would also appreciate reviews so I can see if you like the flow of the story.**

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><p>Her eyes were as gold as her hair. As gold as Edward Elric's eyes. Mustang almost said his name, but no. This was definitely not him. Besides, Edward was a boy. He was a boy as much as he was dead. That was a given. But what was this girl doing with Alphonse? Did Al find her attractive because she looked so much like his brother? Or that she spoke like him too? Mustang quickly put those possibilities out of his mind. The girl must have been in the military before. Or not. She looked too young, about 19 years old only. The youngest military member ever to exist was Edward...and he would've been 19 too. The youngest existing military member was Alphonse. And the person closest to his age was 23. So who was this? Her outfit was disturbingly familiar. Braid, gloves, leather jacket and pants, black tank top, and platformelevator boots. The only thing that made it so alien was her coat; it was white and had no insignia. But everything else...

"Oh look! It's Colonel Bastard!"

Mustang saw her smirk. It was exactly how Edward did it. Slowly and quite 'evilly' like she had something bad planned for your birthday. Well, not evilly. But mischievously. Yes, that was it. The memory was both painful and annoying. Especially on this girl he didn't know.

Alphonse poked her shoulder and whispered something in her ear. She nodded then turned back to Mustang.

"So, apparently, you're a Brigadier General already. But seriously though, one rank in four years? That isn't so great."

She turned back to the statue. "And as for this, hell, it's such a shitty piece of work. Matches his commanding officer's attitude."

Mustang was seething. The statue? Shitty? And him too? What did this bitch think she was? She was so lucky that Hawkeye was there or else he would...

It's so fucking shitty that it deserves this! The blond pressed her hands together then dropped to the ground. The statue melted into the ground and left only the crackle of alchemy behind.

"An alchemist? Who has seen the Truth? Or done Human Transmutation?!" Hawkeye gasped behind him, reaching for her sidearm.

But Mustang was too angry to process what the blond did or what Hawkeye said. He raised his hand and snapped.

He was surprised to see a wall erect around Alphonse. Wouldn't the girl think of protecting herself first? Then suddenly she appeared from nowhere and swung her left fist at him. He backed up and nearly tipped over himself in the process.

"You stupid snap-happy bastard idiot! You almost hit Al you fucking moron!"

Maybe it was an instinct. Maybe he was just really pissed off. Either way, there wasn't any stopping him now. He snapped again.

The blond was graceful, no doubt about that. She danced between the flames weaving in and out. He snapped. The heat didn't seem to bother her, and she transmuted walls and hands and the occasional spike. She barely even got singed. Hawkeye even squeezed off a few bullets, but the blond dodged them too. Mustang was plenty surprised. The last person to be able to do that was him and that was when he was holding back. A lot.

Edward couldn't believe it. She knew Mustang intended to hit her but Al was in the line of fire. '_He should have known better!_' she thought as she somersaulted under another sweltering blast of heat. At least she had managed to turn him completely around. Time for her last trick.

She dropped to the ground and transmuted a spike pointing to him. He stepped back as she hoped he would, finally falling on his bum pretty unflatteringly, putting himself right where she wanted. Running up the spike, using it as a ramp, she transmuted her automail arm into a blade, her favorite weapon. She jumped off the spike and landed, shoving the blade under his chin.

"I hope that that shitty eye patch does something good for you, Mustang, 'cause it sure as hell fucks with your aim and reflexes." Edward smirked down at the older man.

"Fullmetal?!" Mustang asked, his eyes widening, his voice a hoarse whisper, hoarse because the blade was pretty uncomfortable, and in a whisper because he could hardly believe it. But it all made sense now. Sort of.

"No, I'm Rip Van Winkle. Of course I'm Fullmetal. Who else do you know aside from Al with gold hair and eyes?" Ed rolled her eyes at him. "Besides, who else would call you 'Bastard'? I thought I made myself pretty obvious."

Hawkeye, Havoc, Kain, Breda and Falman flashed back to a similar scene, about eight years ago. It was exactly the same except for the fact that Ed was kneeling and pointing his blade up and not straddling Mustang and pointing her blade down. Oh, yes, and the fact that Edward was a girl. And that he was back at all.

Hawkeye was so flustered that she accidentally shot her last bullet a few inches next to Ed's ear.

"Hawkeye. Still lugging the old bastard around, huh?" Ed nodded to the sherry eyed woman.

Mustang snapped again.

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><p><strong>Sorry for the late update, I was a bit busy and I had a few technical difficulties.<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

Mustang sat at his desk then quickly jumped back up when Edward entered. His...her, dammit, coat was almost completely burnt down one side so he...she had taken it off leaving him...her in only his, gah, her jacket. He, she, was looking around like he...she owned the place.

"What are you doing?" He practically roared.

Edward focused her attention on the man he used to piss off and who used to piss him off more than he could to him. And now the situations were reversed. She smirked. Naturally.

"Stop smirking! And answer questions for once!" Mustang saw the smile and felt even more pissed off.

"Maybe you should answer him, Sister." Al pleaded. Edward had to turn so that she couldn't see his eyes. It was seriously impossble to win an argument with her brother now, she realized, even harder than before when he was expressionless because he actually had eyes now and had perfected his pleading-dirty gold eyes thing at her.

"And can you stop with this whole 'Sister' thing?"

Edward looked at him. "Well, I'm trying to get rid of a bad case of nostalgia and deja vu, obviously."

"And this whole 'Sister' act?" He raised his eyebrow.

Edward dropped her singed coat on the couch, then she slipped off her jacket and turned to him.

"Act? This is no 'act', Mustang."

And he couldn't help but stare at the feminine body of Edward Elric.

"How did it happen?"

_Typical Hawkeye_, Edward thought, _Always been the first to break the silence._

She glanced towards the door and relaxed once she realized that it was, indeed, closed. "First off, maybe I should let Al explain..."

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><p><em>And here comes the shocked silence<em>, she thought._ All the time_._ It's just so sickening._

"I... you...I mean, what the..." Mustang was so shocked that he was actually stuttering. Edward just loved tripping people up.

The rest of his team were shocked into utter silence.

"I mean, will you re-enlist?" He managed.

Now it was her turn to be speechless.

"She's, um, thinking about it!" Alphonse quickly put in.

Edward shot a grateful look at her little brother, who had once again saved her from having to make up some stupid excuse. "Uh, yeah! I'm actually still considering it."

"Considering?"

"Yeah, what's wrong with that? I'm still considering. Meaning I-"

"We know what you mean, Fullmetal."

"Then why the fuck do you still have to ask? You know that I don't need to get Al's body."

"Your arm. And for your information, as you so kindly pointed out earlier, you're apparently a-"

"Yeah, I know. I've talked about this with Al. We've decided that it's impossible."

"But then-"

"Equivalent Exchange, Mustang. The Gate and specially Truth, they're merciless. 'Truth takes away the things that we hold onto dearly so that we won't become too conceited'. That's what he told me. When I came back from the Other Side. Take that into consideration. Maybe once you accept it, I'll re-enlist."

"Sister."

"Gah. Fine. I'll tell the truth. And that's a small letter 't' to you."

"You mean you weren't serious about that, Boss? All the 'considering re-enlisting' stuff?" Breda suddenly asked.

"Of course I was kidding. I'm gonna re-enlist and get my old title back. I can't wait to be a Lieutenant Colonel! Besides, you guys will need a replacement Elric. Right, Al?"

"Sister!"

"You weren't going to say anything otherwise."

"Wait, Alphonse, you're going to retire?" Hawkeye couldn't take it as much as she could what just happened earlier.

"Retire?"

"Shut up, Mustang, and let the boy talk."

"What? As if you're-"

_Bang. Bang._

"Are you guys done?"

"Sure. Geez, Hawkeye. I just came back and now you're-"

She pointed her gun at the older Elric. "Yes?"

"Yeah, that's exactly what you're doing. Pointing a gun at my face." Edward muttered.

"Continue, Alphonse." Hawkeye nodded to the blonde teenager.

"Uh, you see, I actually just became a State Alchemist so that I can bring Brother back. And I'm, um successful?"

"Was that a question or an answer?"

"An answer. Definitely an answer."

"He can answer for himself, Fullmetal."

"Yeah, I know. And you do know that I'm not 'Fullmetal' anymore. Or yet. Besides, why don't you just call me Ed or Edward?"

"Don't get your hopes up... wait, what? There's nothing wrong with me calling you 'Fullmetal'!"

"What do you mean, don't get your hopes up? I can pass the fucking exam, you stupid Colonel Bastard! 'Course ou need a few brain cells to know the difference, or did you leave your brain back in the East?"

"What the heck does my brain have to do with your re-enlistment?"

"Shut up, idiot, unless you want more paperwork, complaints for you being too noisy."

"I am not an idiot!"

"Oh yeah, you're just so senile that you can't think anymore."

"I'm not old either! For your information, I've only just turned 26!"

"Brigadier General, would you kindly refrain from lying?" A new voice said.

"Fuhrer President Issac!" Everyone in the room except for Edward quickly acknowledged the Fuhrer.

_What's he doing here? Did he listen in?_

"Who might this young lady be?" The Fuhrer gestured to Edward.

He raised his eyebrow when no one answered.

'_Fuck, I did_ not_ anticipate this situation_', was all Edward could think. _'I am in so much trouble.'_


	7. Note

**To my dear readers: I understand that there has been a misunderstanding; my work was compared with that of silkendreammaid and although I have already cleared things up with the one who complained, I would like suggestions to my story as to avoid the same problem with other readers. But I assure you that all my ideas are original and I have not read Returning Echoes before writing this. If you like, I could make another story or completely change the course of The Comeback, just suggest events that you want to happen. I originally thought for Edward to be attracted to Mustang and vice versa, and that she(he) will retake the Exam and of course, pass. If it seems too much like Returning Echoes, I'm open to ideas, but please don't be disappointed if they aren't used.**

**I won't be writing the next chapter until I get at least three reviews. :)**

**-S**


	8. Chapter 7

**Enormous time lapse.**

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><p>She just couldn't take it anymore. Whoever, or whatever, that was in the darkness was a full scale merciless sadist. If only she hadn't been drunk that day. And so off guard...<p>

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><p><em>Flashback<em>

It was just any regular day. For two people, at least.

For some reason, Havoc, Kain, Breda and Alphonse were talking about something that Edward supposed concerned her and Mustang, because they kept glancing in their general direction. But she thought nothing of it, even when Hawkeye decided to join their conversation. Edward kept working hard as usual, completing reports that were supposed to be Roy's work, but she was doing them anyway to spare him a few hours of sleep, and besides, she didn't have much to do anymore, she also threw away complaints and quite a couple of personal letters asking her out. She finished everything in two hours.

Then came the most embarrassing part. For some reason, she still kept tripping up in front of _him._ But she still had to do her work. So she knocked on his door, then let herself in.

(Current time: 9:00 p.m.)

"Edward. You're done so fast. How did you do it?" Mustang glanced at the stack of papers she put down on his desk.

"You're just too slow," she teased.

"I can be fast sometimes," he grumbled.

"Yeah, sure, but only if I'm not around to help."

"That's not true!"

"Is too!"

"Okay, okay, fine you got me."

"Stupid bastard."

He raised his eyebrow. Edward didn't say it in the way he was used to, her tone was almost affectionate.

"Ever-"

_Click._

The door shut on them.

Edward stared at the locked door. "Hey, you do know that I can just escape using alchemy?"

Hawkeye called back, "Yes, but that would only be if you knew what materials were used to make that room and the door."

Edward looked at Mustang. "Please tell me that they're just joking."

Mustang shook his head. "Unfortunately, no. This is one of those new rooms that were made danger proof, and all these things, there aren't any windows, the door's been recently remodeled to who knows what, and as far as I'm concerned, there aren't any secret passages."

Edward groaned. "I can't do anything, then. I'll suffer from rebound."

"Don't you know what these things are made of?"

"No! I've been too busy doing _your_ work."

"We're stuck then."

"Riza! When are you going to let us out?" Edward called out.

Silence.

"Riza?"

Then to Mustang. "They wouldn't leave us here, right?"

"I hope not."

"That is not reassuring at all."

Mustang shrugged. "It's the best I got."

Edward looked at him. "Please tell me that there's food in here."

He shook his head. "No, but I do have alcohol."

Edward grinned. "And cards?"

"And cards."

"You done with your work?"

Mustang sighed. "I'll never finish it anyway."

"Let's play."

AFTERQUITEAFEWINSTANCESOFEDCHEATINGANDBOTHOFTHEMDRINKINGTOOMUCH

(Current time: 12:30 a.m)

"You've ben cheatin', Ed!"Mustang slurred.

"Nooooo. You've-you're just drunk, ijyut."

"So're yew."

Edward swigged down another glass.

"Stop drin'kin'!"

But it was too late. Edward was completely drunk. She had forgotten her limits and overstepped by one drink. Mustang, however, had recovered, more or less, and he managed to keep a straight head.

"You 'kay, Ed?"

Edward groaned. "Royyyy..."

Mustang blushed. She hadn't ever said his name like that before. But then again, she wasn't ever drunk before.

For some reason, Edward decided to start taking her clothes off.

"Ed? What're you doing?"

Edward pouted. "It's hot in 'ere. You c'n take yer clothes off too."

She crawled up to him then tugged on his jacket. "C'mon, I know that you wan' me, right?"

His heart beat fast. "How'd you know that?"

"Aw, if I want you, doesn't that mean that you'd want me too?"

He moved quickly.

He was on top of her now. He could very clearly see that the bindings she took so much care in tightening had started to become loose. He grabbed her hands and pinned her to the ground.

"That was easy, now wasn't it, Edward?"

Edward would have slapped herself had her arms not been immobile and had she not been drunk. "You aren't drunk, are yew, Roy?"

He smirked. "'Course not. I'm experienced, and besides, I've been drinking so much that I got used to it."

Edward frowned. "How'd you get used to drinkin'? That's really unfeyr, ya know." She started rambling incoherently until Mustang decided to put a stop to it.

He kissed her full on the mouth and caught her by surprise, shutting her up completely.

AFTER,LIKE,AMINUTEOFTHISWEIRDNESSANDBLAHANDEDANDROY

He held himself back. He didn't want to just take her innocence from her just like that. Besides, she was already asleep. He looked at her on the couch in his office, and contented himself with staring at her. Soon enough, he was softly snoring in synch with Edward's silent breathing.

(Current time: 4:30 a.m)

Edward woke up with a really bad headache. It took her a few minutes to get her bearings, and even then, her head still hurt. She spotted Mustang in the other couch, sound asleep, his jacket draped over the arm of the couch. She stumbled over to him then carefully put his jacket over him. She then realized that the door was open. Without much thought, she pushed it open wider and stepped outside, still wondering what she was doing in his office in the first place. She was still getting over her hangover and t was still pretty dark, so she didn't notice the dark shape in the corner of the room. Then the last thing she remembered was a sharp pain at the back of her head, and she blacked out.

(Current time: 8:30 a.m)

"Brigadier General Mustang! Roy!"

Mustang was jolted awake to see Riza standing over him, looking worried.

"What? What?"

She gestured to the other couch, where Edward was supposed to be. But she wasn't there.

He was wide awake now. "What happened?"

"We think that Edward has been kidnapped, sir," she said, her voice shaky.

"K-kidnapped? That's impossible! She isn't that inexperienced!"

Hawkeye showed him a bloodstain on the floor right outside his door. "It also seems like she wasn't able to put up much of a fight."

He stared at the stain. As much as he wanted to believe otherwise, he knew that it really was Edward's. But he still held on to his last shred of hope.

"But she's a really good fighter! Ever since he was twelve! How could..." his voice faltered. He buried his face in his hands. "Oh, no. Oh no, no, no, no, no. Hawkeye, when we were locked up in there, we were drinking. And... and it's all my fault! I have to find her!"

Hawkeye blinked. "You were _drinking_? So hat's what happened. But how did she get the door open? It was locked when we got here."

"I don't know. I don't know. Are there any clues?"

"Just one note."

_**Keine Sorge, Brigadegeneral.**_

_**Sie ist in guten Händen.**_

_**Dies ist nur für die Förderung in der Alchemie und Wissenschaft.**_

_**Möglicherweise können Sie sie zurück zu bekommen, aber ich kann nicht garantieren, dass sie die gleichen sein.**_

_**Und versuchen Sie nicht, sie zu suchen.**_

_**Jeder Schritt, den Sie versuchen, näher an, um ihr wird gerade tat ihr weh,**_

_**und wir brauchen ihre Meinung voll funktionsfähig.**_

_**Bis nach der Operation ist natürlich.**_

_**Schade, dass Sie nicht verstehen, was diese Note sagt.**_

Translation that is currently unknown:

**Don't worry, Brigadier General.**

**She is in safe hands.**

**This is just for the advancement in Alchemy and Science.**

**You might be able to get her back, but I can't assure you that she will be the same.**

**And don't try to look for her.**

**Each step you try to take closer to her will just hurt her,**

**and we need her mind fully operational.**

**Until after the operation, of course.**

**Too bad you can't understand what this note says.**

Mustang read it again and again. "I don't know what it says... It looks German, I think. I can only read 'she', 'alchemy', 'science',... and 'operation'."

* * *

><p>"Miss Elric, haven't you been through worse than this? Haven't you seen Hell? Haven't you died three times, but came back each and every time? Haven't you? Haven't you?"<p>

She screamed without words. As much pain as she had gone through, the voice being ever true, this was far by the worse experience she had ever gone through.

"Stop! Stop it! Don't kill her! Kill me instead!"

Blood spurted all over. On the floor, on the man who held the knife and owned the voice, on Edward.

She screamed again.


End file.
